The 17 types of personalities on every golf buddies’ trip, from the over-indulger to the buzzkill - Golf.com

No golf buddies’ trip would ever come together without the tireless (and often thankless) work of the trip’s planner. But that’s not the only role that’s filled when you hit the road and join your pals for a few days of golf and high jinks. Here are the types of personalities you’ll see on every golf trip. And yes, you certainly can be more than one.

The gambler

They want unlimited presses, action on every up-and-down and will hammer out the post-round damage in no time while sipping a drink from the clubhouse patio. No biggie if they’re on the losing end since they’ve got cash on that three-team parlay that evening.

The mooch

He’ll find a way to have you pay for the first round and promise to pick up the second but, funny, next time the beverage cart rolls by he’ll be digging in the lake for Pro V1s. But that’s just the start. He’ll nickel-and-dime you all week, promise to Venmo in the coming days and then go dark post-trip. Somehow he keeps getting invited back every year.

The over-indulger

He’s away from his job, rambunctious kids and honey-do list, and damn it if he’s not gonna grab two vodka-tonics with every passing of a cart girl (at least when he’s not hitting on her). His score is usually invalid, since the majority of his back nine is spent on the cart as he struggles to stay awake thanks to the Bud Lights he snuck in his bag.

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The planner

The mayor of the trip organizes rounds, teams, lodging and after-hours entertainment. He spends so much time trying to get everything right that you best like it or are bound to hurt his sensitive feelings.

The stick

They were all-conference in high school and hardly play anymore, but they still make your 220-yard wobbly slice look like child’s play compared to their 290-yard draw around the corner. They’ll chip in or make a putt longer than 25 feet at least once per round, but you won’t complain if you’re on the same team.

The other guy

He’s either Mike’s college buddy or perhaps Nick’s brother in law. We’re not really sure. Either way he keeps to himself and laughs at most of our jokes to fit in, so it’s all good anyway.

The social-media star

He’s a social media influencer in the making despite the fact he has a whopping 240 followers. In his mind every hole with water is Insta-worthy, and on that 18th green you best be ready for the group selfie with the flag flapping in the background.

The slow poke

The only thing worse than watching them read six-footers from four different angles is waiting for them to walk 30 yards down the fairway to pace-off yardages from sprinkler heads. That or their seventh practice swing from the tee box.

The guy who is just there for the other stuff

They are going to pick up on a few holes and are most likely to play classic rock from the cart, but let’s be honest, Bruce is really here to play pull-tabs and drink tall boys at Mulligan’s Bar and Grill in a few hours. The golf is just an excuse to hang with friends.

The back-tees guy

A touch over 7,200 yards is a long track for Frank. Frank doesn’t care. We don’t like Frank.

The pro imitator

They dress like they’ll shoot 74 when it’s really going to be more like an 88. Nothing wrong with that, but what really irks you is when they start holding up their hand and using the AimPoint Express technique without having the slightest clue of how to actually do it.

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The can’t-believe-I’m-playing-this-badly guy

He just made his third straight double but he’ll be quick to remind you — even though you didn’t ask — just why that should have been an easy par and how his approach was just inches from being a birdie, probably. Afterward he’ll give you the shot-by-shot breakdown with the summation that, darn it, his 97 probably should have been a smooth 83.

The know it all

They played here once five years ago so of course they like their numbers better than the caddie’s, and whatever you do, don’t start arguing that their version of Wolf is wrong because everyone knows you’ll never win that one. Worse yet, just wait until you rocket a drive into the woods — he’ll be the first to tell you how to fix that pesky miss.

The can’t-disconnect-from-work-or-family guy

There is the player who likes to unplug and be device-free on the links, and then there is this guy. Don’t be this guy. They’ll finish holes early to gain an extra few minutes to hash out their call, yet when it’s their turn to hit they’ll be 30 yards away pacing behind the tee box, trying to brainstorm strategies on how corporate can reach next month’s goals or ask how Little Lisa’s pageant went.

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The buzzkill

Everyone was having a blast until, right on cue, Justin had enough of his three-jacks and walked into the clubhouse or pouted on the cart. There goes that friendly Nassau.

The optimist

Bless Billy’s heart. His swing would make most of us quit the game yet he just shot 102 with only six lost balls and 44 putts but thinks he found something. Bill and his sunny disposition has also never seen a shot he hasn’t complimented.

The gadget guy

He’s got a rangefinder ready, a stroke counter strapped to his belt and owns more swing aids than Padraig Harrington. Yet he somehow still can’t break 90.

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https://www.golf.com/news/features/2019/06/28/17-types-personalities-every-golf-buddies-trip/

2019-06-28 11:20:46Z
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